Category: spirk

Kirk: h-
Spock: Your feelings have been noted and I will get back to you in 3-5 business days

Kirk: I miss Spock.
Bones: Jim…
Kirk, sighing: Spock used to call me that…
Bones: Because it’s your fucking name!

Kirk: Danger is my middle name!
Spock: I thought it was Tiberius?

Bones: Are you okay, Jim?
Kirk: I’ll be fine.
Chekov: Is this about Spock dying?
Bones: No, Chekov, he’s upset because they keep changing the taste of Coke.

Chekov: You and Spock just need to bone.
Kirk: What did you say?
Sulu: Don’t say it again.
Chekov: I said you two need to bone.
Kirk, gasping: How dare you Ensign Chekov, I am your SUPERIOR OFFICER.
Kirk: BONE?!?!?
Kirk: My history with Spock is none of your business
Kirk: BONE?!!!!!!!!

uhura: kirk and spock were acting so gay on the bridge today
chapel: how gay?
uhura: chekov and sulu kept looking behind them and whispering “gay”

Kirk: This is the cruelest, meanest, least-funny thing you’ve ever done!
Spock: Grammar, Captain. That was a very redundant sentence.

kirk: spock is an annoying wiseass who tends to make everyone he meets want to kill him, and when I have that much in common with someone, I can’t help but like him a little.

Kirk: Are you implying that I’m a troublemaker?
Spock: Of course not. I am blatantly stating it.

bones: do you know how many times your boyfriend has accidentally started fires?
spock: i don’t know… many?
bones: eighteen!
kirk: seventeen!
bones: what about this one?
kirk: oh yeah, eighteen if you count this one.