Kirk: [in the middle of a mission going South] You know, it’s at times like this that I really wish I’d listened to what Bones told me.
Spock: Why, what did he tell you?
Kirk: I don’t know, I didn’t listen.
Spock, who took flirting advice from Bones: your hair looks good today
Kirk: it looks good everyday
Spock: you make flirting very hard
Kirk: you make me very hard *winks*
Kirk: that’s how you flirt
jim kirk when told that he’s a starfleet officer and can’t fuck off to space to search for spock:
Spock: There’s no fight to be had here.
Jim: Yeah, you’re right. I’m not going to fight them.
Jim: EXCEPT THAT I AM!
Spock: My intestines do not speak well of this.
Kirk: I’m guessing his gut tells him something is wrong.
Bones: Oh… oooh!