Category: sulu

chekov: Are you gay or Asian I’m confused which is it
sulu: i just want u to know that this is THE funniest question anyone has ever asked me

sulu: my leopard gecko hasn’t eaten for over a week. vet said he’s extremely healthy and the reason he’s not eating is likely due to him entering breeding season early.
sulu: can you imagine someone handing you a burger and you being like “i can’t eat this i’m too fucking horny”
spock: It’s happened before

scotty: whats up slim jim
chekov: slimford jimford
sulu: slimmy jimmy
kirk: stop

Chekov: Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock’s wedding will be the wedding of the century!
Sulu: Took about that long to happen.

Kirk, after hearing that half of his crew is being transferred: They’re making a huge, huge mistake. Let’s see the Admirality replace these people. Let’s see them find another Scotty. You think Scotties grow on trees? Well, they don’t. There is no Scotty tree. Do you think the world is crawling with Sulus? Show me that farm. With Sulus and Chekovs sprouting up all over the place, ripe for the plucking. Show me that farm.

Sulu: *trying to solve a hard puzzle so they can get back to the Enterprise before dying*
Random Alien/Red Shirt: My life is in the hands of an idiot?
Chekov: No, no, no. Two idiots.

sulu: putting milk in the bowl first is divorce worthy
scotty: or wetting your toothbrush BEFORE putting tooth paste on
chekov: wow excuse you maybe I like to soften the bristles first
rand: who the fuck doesn’t wet their tooth brush before putting toothpaste on what the fuck
chapel: who the fuck does
uhura: i the fuck do
kirk: what the fuck man
bones: fuck you


george takei and nichelle nichols in star trek “the omega glory”


starfleet: here are your weapons. u got guns, photon lasers, anything you could possibly think of. 


Kirk: My moral alignment is chaotic lawful.
Bones: …
Bones: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Sulu: He has a strict moral code but nobody can figure out what the hell it is.